That Defence Mode
Can’t take criticism? Then, you’ve got a problem, a big one,
For how can there be any growth where criticism we shun?
You see, we all need to be challenged, for that’s the only way
We can learn of our faults and errors, at the end of the day.
When we can’t take such, it’s due to one of two things, clearly,
We’ve either got issues, or we simply aren’t humble, sadly.
Yes, either we’re reacting to something that’s in our past, or,
We’ve an ego problem — in other words, pride is at the core.
Perhaps when we were young, we were often criticized badly,
And now, find such hard to accept, even when it’s done rightly.
You see, criticism isn’t bad if it’s constructive, and,
If spoken in love, for such is needed, you must understand.
Yes, we need others who can provide some objectivity,
Which, friend, is something that most of us lack, unfortunately.
We’re too caught up in ourselves, too close to the scene, usually,
Unable or unwilling to see those things it’s best we see.
In fact, we should embrace criticism — that is, if it’s fair,
By that I mean, appropriate, warranted, worthy of the ear.
Yes, we should welcome another’s assessment, appraisal, and,
Not see it as a brick-bat, but rather, as a helping hand.
We need to get past that silly, “Don’t judge me,” mentality,
And to stop excusing our faults and errors so childishly.
Sometimes we need a rebuke, a flea in our ear, a wake up,
Or a wrench from our “poor ole me” self-pity drinking cup.
Criticism that comes from a critical spirit isn’t good,
And as for self-righteous judging — well, tell me, friend, what fool would?
But rightful assessing, alias critiquing, has its place,
So, let’s not get things twisted, but rather, reality face.
By Lance Landall
You might like to read my poem "To Judge Or Not To Judge" (This poem contains Biblical texts).
Criticism
If you’ve a problem with me, will you help me, rather than knock me?
That is, you can tell me where I’m going wrong, just don’t rubbish me.
And when you point out that wrong, please do it with sensitivity,
Lest you get my back up, and I ignore what you say, foolishly.
I need to know where I’m going wrong, but tell me constructively,
For then I’ll have a handle I can grasp, and I will, willingly.
I know that changes are required, and I want to see them too,
But such takes time, so please be tolerant, for there may be a few.
And regarding my error, or failing, please act objectively,
So that in my eyes, your criticism will have credibility.
I’ll listen, mull over your comments, and take them seriously,
And I’ll be more likely to succeed if you help and support me.
That is, if you show understanding, respond compassionately,
Which certainly will help to convince me of your sincerity.
Yes, I’ll be receptive to your approaches should you act this way,
For only a fool or a narcissist wouldn’t be receptive, I’d say.
By Lance Landall
Criticizers
Sometimes, because of unique problems, and therefore, peculiar ways,
Others can view us oddly, treat us unkindly, which hurts, dismays.
Thus, out of ignorance, or thoughtlessness, they add to our distress,
Via their sad behaviour, or via the unkind things that they express.
Hence, “They just don’t understand,” can be very true indeed, sadly,
And not just the words of someone who is into self-pity.
But rather, the cry of many who have good reason to say so,
And who far too often receive another discouraging blow.
Rather than being moved by compassion, many simply criticize,
Condemning in others what they overlook in themselves, fault wise.
And seemingly only seeing what they want to, not what they should,
Just focusing on someone’s peculiarities, not their good.
So many struggle with things they don’t understand, and wish weren’t so,
Bravely struggling with burdens that only the same sufferers know.
And too often they’re treated like lepers, ridiculed, criticized,
When it’s the criticizer’s actions that need to be scrutinized.
By Lance Landall
